I have developed software for Windows since 3.1. On the whole, Windows has evolved to an excellent operating system with a high degree of consistency and continuity for developers. I became acutely aware of the advantages of Windows through painful experiences distributing programs in Linux. This said, the question remains: why is Windows so irritating to use? My thought is that the technical aspects of Windows are good, but the human-engineering aspects are terrible. For example, after Windows updates in the background, it asks if you want to reboot. Invariably the answer is no because you’re in the middle of something. Unfortunately, that answer is not an option. The only alternative is Remind me later. And it does, over and over again until you are defeated. The only recourse is to restart the machine and try to find some worthwhile activity while it reboots. I can’t solve that problem, but I can offer a few suggestions for making Windows less irritating. My solutions are trivial, but not so trivial that it didn’t take me 15 years to implement them.
The sounds of silence
At a meeting I recently attended, a participant turned off his laptop. The inevitable Windows good-bye-ding-dong song was intrusive to the point where it became the topic of discussion. One observation was that it was probably the most frequently-played musical phrase in the world — wouldn’t the composer be lucky if he got royalties each time it was performed. This incident led to an epiphany: wouldn’t I be a lot happier if I never heard those sounds again? Here’s how to turn them off. Go to Control panel/Sounds and pick the Sounds panel. Under Program, highlight Windows/Exit Windows. In Sounds, pick (None). Repeat for the options Windows/Start Windows, Windows/Windows logoff and Windows/Windows Logon. In Vista, uncheck the box Play Windows Startup sound. You’ll be surprised how much better life seems, and you may notice a significant drop in your blood pressure.
Notification area discipline
The notification area is the section of the toolbar on the bottom right side of the screen. It tells you the time and runs applets to set the speaker volume,…. Most of these applets have been there since you bought the computer and most are never used. If you display all of them, they occupy valuable real estate on the screen and occasionally raise the troubling question, “What is that supposed to do?” If you pick the option Hide unused icons, Windows always seems to hide the ones that you actually use. Here’s the solution. Make sure a USB drive is plugged in so that the Safely remove hardware icon is visible. Right-click on an empty spot on the Taskbar and choose Properties to bring up this dialog.
Choose the System icons that you want to show, then check the box Hide inactive icons. Click the Customize button to show a list of potential applets. Highlight each one you want to appear and choose the option Show. Similarly, set the applets that you seldom use (or don’t know the function of) to Hide. Click OK to return to the main dialog. Click Apply and then OK. The result is a clean notification area that only shows the applets that you actually use. You can always see the full set by clicking on the arrow on the left side of the area.
Mystery icons
My before example in the picture above doesn’t look too bad because I had already removed much chaff. For example, during the three years I have run the computer I have never changed the graphics settings. Do I need to run a continual background task so that I can tune the graphics settings? Among its many features, WinPatrol is a good utility to eliminate unnecessary startup tasks. If you pay $29.95 for the Plus version, you have access to a vast database on the function of almost every mysterious startup program. I recommend disabling the tasks (rather than removing them) so you can restore the function. On the other hand, I have removed scores of startup tasks from computers over the years and never noticed a difference.
Postscript: The procedure for cleaning the notification area worked almost perfectly. I should have known that Windows has ways of dealing with hubris. My netbook running XP shows an icon informing me that my network cable is unplugged. This is not surprising, considering that I never have and never will attach an ethernet cable to the WiFi machine. All my attempts to eliminate or hide this icon have been futile. It may disappear for a couple boots, but always comes back.